I'm an orderly person. I'm Anglican, and I like the liturgical seasons. Things happen in order, in a process that makes sense.
I like to begin new things on Mondays or on the first day of a new season. But I'm learning that God doesn't always work that way.
Lent begins a week from tomorrow, and I'd planned to start writing this blog that day. And yet here we are, because today the Spirit moved.
Over the next weeks, I plan to fill in the gaps on our history, how and why we are where we are, but for now, I'll just lay the groundwork.
My husband Clint is an ordained Anglican priest. He came to the calling later in life; he celebrated the fourth anniversary of his ordination on February 13th. He's been out of seminary for nearly 6 years.
From 2011 until 2014, he worked in hospice chaplaincy. How he got there, and how God equipped him for that, is an entire post unto itself. Suffice it to say that although that was the last place we'd have expected him to land, it was where he also thrived.
In 2014, Clint left hospice chaplaincy to accept the position of assisting priest at our own church. We moved to be closer to his new job, and for two years, he had his first experience with parish ministry.
Things were not always easy. There were a myriad of reasons why: coming into a situation where there was already an established leadership and being expected to make changes was a challenge. Being a new priest and yet not a young man also had its difficulties. A difference in priorities was also evident early on.
By last December (2016), as a family we had been dealing with the stress of this situation for too long to ignore it. Clint and I decided to seek God's will for us in a bolder way than we had before: we spent the week leading into Christmas fasting and praying, asking God to open doors, to close doors, to reveal His will for all of us (all of our children were at crossroads, too) and to give us the strength to trust His path.
The week ended, and Christmas began. We had a beautiful and quiet holiday. On January 6th, Epiphany, the last day of Christmas, I attended the service at our church, and afterward, I stayed to pray with a couple of friends who were struggling.
About three hours later, Clint came home carrying a box, telling me that he had been let go by the church.
Over the six weeks or so that have passed since then, we've had our ups and downs. We've been angry (mostly me), sad (mostly Clint), hurt, a little bitter, relieved (both of us!), heartened and discouraged. We have had wonderful visits and encouragements from those within the church and without, and we've also had some mean-spirited and chastising messages and emails.
But we KNOW that this is God working. We might not love how man has implemented it, but we see God's loving hand all the time. He is so good!
One of the things God impressed on us early was that Clint is to continue to use the gifts God has refined in him. This is pastoral care: caring for people at the point of their greatest need. This can include death, birth, marriage, transition, job loss, illness, spiritual need . . . but can also encompass anyone who simply needs a set of listening ears, helping hands and a broad shoulder on which to lean. He's begun something called The Community Chaplain, and he will minister under that heading in whatever capacity God calls him.
Another thing--and this is a big one--that God has impressed on us is that He is calling us to utter and complete reliance on Him. JUST Him. He has promised that He will provide for us, and we are not to chase after another position--we are to serve HIM.
This is scary, right? Don't we all like to rely on the salary that comes in every two weeks, the health care benefits, the nice 401(k) sitting out there for retirement? We like to know we can pay the bills, yes?
I'm the worst at this. I'm the one who lies awake at night, dreading having to rob Peter to pay Paul in the morning. But amazingly, although it's never happened before, God has given me tremendous peace about this.
It may not last all the time. Just like when Peter walked on water to Jesus, I'm great when my eyes are on Him, but when I look down at the waves, I may start to sink. Fair warning.
This blog will be about transparency. I'm not going to lie; we have bills that we have to pay. We have rent every month, one car payment (mine), car insurance, utilities and other bills. We have pared down to bare bones, getting rid of cable and anything that we don't need. We do have to buy food, as we like to eat, but we are thrifty folk.
As an author, I can contribute to our upkeep, but right now, I'm not making quite enough to cover all of our bills. Perhaps God will increase sales to make that happen. Or perhaps it will merely be contributions coming in exactly when needed, as needed.
We don't know the hows, but we know the Who. God is going to handle this.
If you're a friend or just an interested party, you may be asking how you can help. (I hope you are!). Here are some ideas:
--PRAY FOR US!!! Please add us to your regular list of prayers. Lift us up for strength, for provision and for God to guide us to those whom need the ministry.
--Share the news! Please share this blog, share Clint's website and Facebook page . . . tell anyone. Also, if you know someone in need, please share our info with that person. There is no charge, no obligation, and newsflash! You don't have to be a Christian for us to help you. We minister to all regardless of color, creed, orientation or nationality.
--Be sensitive to the Spirit: if you are a follower of the Way, please be prayerfully sensitive if you feel God is calling you to make a contribution to this ministry. Don't give unless God lays it on your heart. We're serious about this. Not everyone is called to support every ministry. He will provide regardless, and we feel WHO God uses is just as important as how He used them.
--Ask questions. Feel free to ask stuff, even if it feels too personal. I'll do my best to answer honestly.
Okay, I think that's it for today. I am going to add a little list of God's answers below, just so you can see what's happening.
1) Last week was rough. Our daughter Cate is in college, in her last year at Seminole State before she transfers to . . . we don't know where. Her tuition has always been covered by Pell Grants (pastors don't make much money, even when they're employeed!). She found out last week that the grant had declined to cover two of her courses, meaning we owed $700. ANSWER: Yesterday, Cate got an email from the head of her honors department that she had been awarded a grant to cover the last $700. PRAISE GOD!!!
2) Also last week, Haley's check engine light came on. Yikes again! We have some old cars. ANSWER: we used our son-in-law's diagnostic tool and found out the problem was a need for new spark plugs and points. We had enough money to buy them on Amazon, they were delivered the next day and Clint and Haley installed them together. The car is running great now. :D
3) My last royalty check from my publisher was one that should help us for a couple of months, which is good, because my royalties overall have been down. Praise God!!
4) Our son David and Clint both have health needs that require meds. We had applied for coverage under the ACA and learned Friday that we will be covered. Praise God!!
PRAYER NEEDS:
1) Haley had a bout with mastoiditis a few weeks ago and it seems like it might be still troubling her. Haley doesn't have health coverage at this point (she didn't qualify). Please pray for her complete healing.
2) Cate's car's check engine light came on Sunday. It looks like the catalytic converter, but we won't know until she takes it to our mechanic friend tomorrow (Weds). Please pray for a quick and easy fix so she can get to and from school.
3) David's asthma has been flaring, thanks to the wacky weather. Please pray for his health and healing.
4) Since I'm paid for book sales 60 days beyond (in March, I'm paid for December; in April, I'll be paid for January, etc.), what I'm selling now is important for maintaining us in May and beyond. Please pray for a jump in sales!
God bless you, God bless us, and until next time, keep the faith. Our prayers are lifted for all of you daily.
